January 18, 2022

From the Barns: Grieving a loved one

I wasn’t going to send an article this month, but decided I should share information. We all know that as we age transitions must happen. Even knowing that and trying our best to be prepared, it is still very difficult to accept. Emotions run high as we recall special moments with loved ones. Every little bit, as the days pass, things remind us of those special or even ordinary moments that we shared. That makes those recalled moments difficult, yet at the same time very precious. That is the time I share with you right now.

My Jane, wife of almost 53 years, passed away Dec. 4 after a courageous battle with health issues and lastly COVID-19. She was my rock in so many ways and I am missing her greatly. My achievements in life, both subjectively and objectively, don’t seem nearly as important now as they once did. We shared everything, so much of that everything is gone. But, fortunately, I have three wonderful daughters that all have many of the same characteristics as their mother. With that I consider myself so very fortunate. I also am very much attached to the land I love, River Oak Ranch. Most of you understand that deep bond, too. So, as we transition in life, we cling to those pillars we know and trust.

Here at River Oak, the winter grazing season is winding down. We brought all the cows across the river and through the woods on Jan. 6 and into the last of the stockpiled fescue. The snow, of course, is making it a lot more difficult to harvest the last. But until the snow, we had a really great winter graze.

By the time I write again, we will be close to frost seeding and no-tilling some clover seed. Time will pass and healing will come, yet so slowly. Thank you to those of you who called or sent cards. Each one meant so much. Be safe and sane.

Trevor Toland

Trevor Toland

Macomb, Ill.