Social relationships impact well-being, lower stress

BEMIDJI, Minn. — The unique agricultural work environment can cause stress for farmers and farm families.

“There are not always trained providers who understand the behavioral health issues related to the farming community,” said Brenda Mack, assistant professor and field director in the Social Work Department at Bemidji State University.

“So, it can be difficult to seek help from others when we don’t feel like they understand what the contributing factors are that are impacting our emotional health and well-being,” said Mack during a webinar hosted by American AgriWomen.

Some of the contributing factors unique to the farming community include financial pressures, lack of control over outside influences such as weather or commodity prices, extreme outdoor working conditions, excessive work load and exhaustion.

“Also the stigma of seeking help when stress has gotten out of control or there’s not a good way to manage it,” said Mack, who grew up in a family farm in Minnesota and is now married to a fourth-generation small-crop farmer.

Stress may increase during the holiday season, especially for women.

“Research tells us holiday stress has a particular impact on women who take charge of many of the holiday celebrations,” Mack said. “In addition, we have a harder time relaxing during the holidays and we are more likely to fall into bad habits to manage stress such as comfort eating.”

When someone is stressed, Mack said, it can be helpful to acknowledge it and name the feelings around the stress such as sadness, frustration, exhaustion or guilt.

“Give yourself permission to sit with your feelings,” said Mack, who is also a 2020-2021 National Rural Health Association fellow. “We get to have any feeling we want when something is impacting us.”

The next step is to think about what a person has control over in that situation.

“You might not have control over commodity prices or something rude someone says to you at Christmas,” Mack said. “But you do have control over things like being able to breathe deeply and say this is not the hill I’m going to die over — I’m going to let that go.”

Mack encourages people to share their thoughts, feelings, frustrations and ideas with someone they can trust and lean on.

“Connecting with others is a strategy for stress prevention and reduction,” she said. “We are hardwired to connect with others — it’s what gives us purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it, there is suffering.”

Countless studies have found that social relationships are the best guarantee of heightened well-being and lowered stress, Mack said.

“Both are an antidote for depression and prescription for high performance,” Mack said.

“Connection with others and relationships are so critical when we’re dealing with the stress of our normal lives, as well as during the holiday season,” she said. “Think about your person that you can lean into in times of distress.”

Self care is a mindful engagement in a healthy lifestyle that builds resiliency to endure personal and professional challenges and demands.

“Self care is not a selfish act and it is also not meant to be something to increase your stress,” Mack said. “You should engage in at least one self care activity on a regular basis that fills your cup.”

A self-care plan needs to be individualized.

“My self-care plan will look different than yours,” Mack said. “Use the self-care plan to reduce your stress and increase your joy rather than an additional something you have to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed.”

Self-care plans can include physical components such as exercising, eating right or getting enough sleep.

“I enjoy reading uplifting books and I also love listening to podcasts,” Mack said.

Additional self-care plan options include engaging in social activities such as playing cards and engaging in recreational activities like putting a puzzle together or working on crossword puzzles.

“You can choose gratitudinal activities like sending cards and letters of appreciation to people who have made an impact on your life,” Mack said. “You may also engage in contemplative activities such as mindfulness activities that could include yoga or relaxation exercises.”

A self-care plan may include tapping into faith and religious practices and addressing financial self care in a plan may be helpful to some people.

“Practicing self compassion and self grace means not being so hard on yourself when you haven’t lived up to an expectation,” Mack said. “Think about the compassion you show to others and then think about putting a mirror in front of yourself and practicing that same compassion with yourself.”

Mack encourages people to treat themselves as they would a good friend.

“Self care is not an expense — it’s an investment,” Mack said. “An empty lantern provides no light so self care is the fuel that allows your light to shine brightly.

“Self care is a deliberate choice to gift our self with people, places, events and opportunities that recharge our personal battery and promote whole health body, mind and spirit,” she said.